Occidental Audiophonical Anecdotes
Just trips off the tongue, doesn't it? Occidental Audiophonical Anecdotes. These are a collection of audio versions of the stories in the book 'The Occidental Tourists'. But to be honest, I have made a few changes and the audio pieces are more 'product' than true to the original stories. I have jazzed them up a bit. Taken liberties. Lied. Or did I?
I might have lied in the first place and have come clean. You'll never know. But try them anyway.
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Number 1
It Ain't Half Hot Mumbai Miraj Cookie Monster
Arrival in India for the first time - 1996 Journey from Mumbai to Goa - 1996 Hash cookie insanity in the desert. Sam Dunes, Rajasthan - 1997
Number 2
To Fly like a Bird Much ado about nothing Massage a la Brutal
A festival that appears to be Kerala's Brouhaha on a flight to Delhi. Not to be confused Massage with a stark difference.
best kept secret to this day - Chenkal 2000 with the Shakespeare classic - 2013 Diu Island 2017
Number 3
Upstaging the Mahatama Oh Kolkata Tara Maa Tara
Unwanted attention and hidden agendas
the Gandhi Ancestral Home. Porbandar - 2017
A narrow escape from Nikoncussion on a flight from Mumbai to Kolkata in 2019
Brahmin Bunkum leads to Darshan
and Dash. Tarapith - 2019
Number 4
Spiritual Intercourse At the Mandir of Madness The Fakest Show on Earth
Constructional coitus, a Basilica of the Bizarre, and a clear case of deicide cover-up.
Veraval - 2017
What weird, wonderful, strange, and sinister things you find on random strolls through Indian towns and cities.
Tarapith - 2019
Tickets to see the Naga Sadhus performing ceremonies in their camp on the eve of the most auspicious day of the Kumbh. It just seemed too good to be true, and you know what they say? Pryag Raj - 2019
Number 5
Say Saddam Tragical Mystery Tour Coco Nutjob
Don't say 'Cheese', say 'Saddam'. A clear case of mistaken identity on a beach in Gujarat - 2017
Abandonment, rip-off, backstabbing, and a good deed done down. A day that just kept on giving
Uttah Pradesh - 2013
Festival time is a time of giving, and the festival of Dasara is no exception. But beware of Sikhs bearing gifts. (Actually they were Hindus, but that didn't work nearly as well as Sikhs). Especially the gifts that keep on giving, despite your prayers to all the 33 million gods for it to stop. Madikeri - 2015
Number 6
Gorehound Packnophobia The Occidental Tourists
Meat is Murder so Fowl. And never have murderers been more happy at their work. Meeting Junagadh's jovial slaughter men in their carnival of carnage.
Junagadh - 2017
Cabin and baggage? Guns and ammo?! What the FAQ!
2013
Of hospitality and cordiality, enough to make you wilt. Chance encounters, kindness to strangers, and big fat helpings of guilt. Graciousness, altruism, generosity, and why you should avoid them at all costs. Junagadh - 2017
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